Hello again Dear Ones:
God crumbled me today. In a good way because He is a good God. I had been feeling like such a project for him. So many internal issues wrestling inside myself.
Character issues. Forgiveness issues. Honor issues. Selfishness. Not a pretty list is it?
If you read my post yesterday I was feeling really bad about honoring the difficult people. I kept thinking what is wrong with me? Why is this so hard? Why doesn't hearing the truth, hearing the word make this any easier? Why do I have to have these issues?
A snipit from one of My Pastors sermons today was on Facebook. I watched it and then I crumbled. It was like a piece of the wall that has had me inprisoned was chipped away.
Yes there have been difficult people in my life. Yes there have been hurts. Some situations left me raw and broken and full recovery has eluded me. Today though it became clear that I am partially to blame. I put people in a position to fill things inside of me that they were not designed to fill. I put them in the position of trying to turn a "good thing into a God thing" the position of turning " human encouragement into heavenly affirmation"
As this truth crumbled me before the Lord today, I felt hope. I want those walls torn completely down. I want to be set free. I want what only God can give me.
Father God forgive me for putting people in positions that they were not designed for. Forgive me, for ONLY you can affirm my deepest needs. Father God you are so incredibly faithful. Even if I am a huge project you will be faithful to complete the good work you have begun in me.
Take down the walls. Rebuild fresh and new.
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Monday, May 13, 2013
Good Morning Dear Ones:
I hope this Monday morning finds you in a good spot in life. I had a lovely Mothers Day yesterday thanks to my wonderful husband and children. They blessed me with my favorite. Hand written notes. My number one love language is words of encouragement and I simply treasure their precious words from the heart to me.
Yesterday was also a great sermon at church. It was from the Elevation Honorology series. I had heard this one before and this series remains one of my all time favorites.
Even though I had heard this particular message before there were things that still fell on me fresh. I can honestly say my heart greatly desires to live a life of honor. For some it comes pretty easy. For instance the people that make deposits in your life. Those who invest and pour into you. Those who make a wrong right. I find my love account is so full for these people that honor comes very naturally. Then there are those people who don't make deposits. Some in fact who only withdraw from your account. I personally find it a great challenge to honor those people.
Pastor said something yesterday that really struck me. He said it's not based on what they have done for you but based on what He has done for you. WOW huh? It doesn't make honoring difficult people any easier but it has changed my perspective. It is my prayer that if I can keep my perspective in the right place that my actions will fall in line.
Father god, you know my heart. I want to walk in your ways. I want to live a life of honor. Give me your perspective and value for others. You know where I am weak. In those areas Lord I ask that you change me. Where I am weak,because of you, please make me strong.