Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Combatting Complaining

Dear Ones:

I have so been loving the extra quiet time with my Jesus lately and as a cherry on top the chance to get to my blog and share. This morning allowed me to listen to another elevation church sermon. I started a new series about waiting.

I have to say it is one of my weakest areas. I don't like to wait. In fact I loath waiting. Until this morning  I thought it was just because I was impatient. I am sure that is part of it, but something was exposed in me this morning that I think is really going to help me out.

Complaining...yep, I do it more than I even want to admit to. And you know what it makes me miserable. It keeps my eyes focused on my problem and not on my Jesus. Then I get stuck in the rut of wait, complain, miserable, wait, complain, miserable.

Do you know the Israelite journey to the promised land was only supposed to be two weeks long and their grumbling and complaining against God landed them forty years instead. Thats a sobering thought isn't it?

My biggest battles with complaining recently have been with our housing situation and certain relationships. We have been trying to sell our house for years now. It has been on and off the market for  quite some time. The main reason is that getting our boys to school takes literally hours of my day. And the girls, well let's just say... not the best car company. Sometimes the thoughts of making our life easier and escaping the problem of no support consume me.

Some of the points I needed to hear today were:

Make the waiting room a workroom ~ Preoccupy yourself with fulfilling God's purpose instead of escape ~ Our detours are often God's destinations

The best way not to complain is to do just the opposite, to praise. I think I am really going to have to resist the urge to complain but I took this note, that I think will help me do just that:

"Let your pain trigger a praise." I thought about the relationships that have hurt me. Why do I want to focus on one who doesn't celebrate with me when so many others do? As the sting of being ignored burned me this morning I thought my praise could be the text I got from my best friend this morning expressing her joy and celebration. I am so thankful for that. I praise God for that.

Im sick of misery and waiting going hand in hand. The journey should be enjoyed. There is work to be done. There is purpose. If God has us still here, no matter how badly I want to move, he has purpose, even if it is just protection, which brings me to detours and destinations. Sometimes waiting just re- routes you.

This had me thinking, you know we started our adoption journey in Guatemala. That was our destination and boy did we get a detour. Now as we are coming to finalizing Jubilees adoption I can see so clearly that we had the wrong destination in mind. I praise God for re-routing us. My destinations anyhow are always moving targets. I get there and then there is something else to wait for.

So I am declaring war. Seriously. I will let my pain trigger praise. I will find purpose instead of seeking escape. I will fix my eyes on Jesus, he alone knows just when and where to take me on this journey. Even in correction I feel His enormous love for me. Praise Him!!!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Paper Signing and Potty Training

Dear Ones:

Well today is an exciting day in our family. Today we meet with our adoption worker and sign our adoption placement agreement. This means once that ink has dried there is no more risk. Jubilee hope won't be going anywhere. I don't even know if it has really hit me yet that this day is here. You kind of just get used to living in limbo mode, but some finality is on the way. Once we sign, we again wait for the judge to sign for finalization. Then we CELEBRATE!!! I already have great ideas for her party. I have her outfit and let me tell you it is adorable. As soon as I can Ill be sharing pictures of her adorable face... I can hardly stand it so stay tuned...

And now for potty training. It has me discouraged. We have been working on it for over a year. The special education school worked on it for over a year and still those dots do not connect. I went online last night to try and research some resources for training special needs kids. Once again everything I read about F.A.S children left me even more discouraged.

I read this many times from different sources last night:

"It is common for the child with FAS to still be having issues around toilet training at age 6 or even later sometimes up to age 8. The less concern about this, the better. The neural pathways are not yet well-formed, and when the brain development progresses, there will be progress. Sensory input is sometimes not functioning properly, and the message does not get from the body to the brain in time to act. This is almost always a neurological issue, rather than a psychological one."

Why does this bother me so much? Options. The longer my girls struggle with this area the less options will be available for them. I am loving their new pre-school, but I stress that if progress continues to prolong and if Mercy continues to dig in her messy diapers (happened twice at school last week and I woke up to her artwork this morning) then it may become more than the school is willing to take on. Then what will we be left with? I know this challenge like all the others they face I need to just submit it to prayer and trust in my God who loves those sweet chocolattes more than I do. Fear has just been gripping me about it all so can I ask for some prayer? That we will have wisdom and patience and that I will rest knowing that God is going to provide the very best for my girls. That they will progress and shine for His glory because I will continue to believe that F.A.S will be fulfilling. almighty's. story.

Thanks for listening...

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