Just thinking about my sweet Jubilee (Big Sister) this morning. It has been 167 days since our last court date. That is exactly 5 months and 14 days since the judge terminated parental rights. Which is precisely 2 years 5 months and 14 days since she came to our home.
It has been easier somewhat since Mercy's adoption was final. It was like putting down large buckets full of concrete and finally resting the day she became ours. I didn't have to worry about her life anymore. I knew she would be loved and taken care of. It just seems logical that Big Sister will follow suit right?
The other day she was coming home on the bus and I had to go to an appointment and passed her on the hill going up to our house. The bus aid told Eric she lost it when she saw me pass. She cried her eyes out for Mommy. She thought I was leaving her.
Like I have said before, the judge has no time limit to make a decision on this second appeal and then birth mom technically will still get another appeal if she decides to do so.
I am just ready for the judge to make a decision already. We have to figure out a way to get 12 hours of training in before May now so she can remain in our home. Training that I have never found useful. I'm ready to put her buckets down. I'm ready to not have to worry about her well being. To know she will be safe, loved and taken care of.
Can I just ask for prayer today my friends? Pray we will hear something soon. Pray it will be in our favor. Pray she will transfer to the adoption unit soon.
I think most days I am doing pretty well waiting on the Lord with this, but today I just want to cry.