Monday, January 11, 2010

Beauty For Ashes

Dear Ones:

You know right now I just want to praise my God. My heavenly Father. I am in awe of Him. I am not even sure if this post will make sense but it is burning to get out of me.

That phrase beauty for ashes. It wonderfully sums up my life. Now I am by far NOT a theological expert but this is how I am seeing it.

I was lost and now I am found. I am a sinner saved by grace. He is faithful when I am faithless.

I feel like I am struggling to get my point across. I keep typing sentences and then deleting them. I guess it boils down to this. I live inside myself. I far to well know my insecurities and flaws and weaknesses. But you know what? He loves me to much to leave me that way. Though painful and confusing at times, He keeps me in process. As I sit at my desk and weep I am just so thankful. Thankful that the Father thinks I am worth it.

My biggest struggle lately has been DEMORALIZATION. My bible study talked about it this week and it literally almost took my breath away.

Demoralize - When Satan figures out who we fear most we are and sets out to confirm it. Of course he twists some truth in it all so you buy it.

How good is God to bring this to my attention? Some times it freaks me out how personal he can be with me. I know that probably sounds funny, but I literally at times sit and just say WOW, God once again you hit the nail on the head. He meets me at my exact area of struggle and point of need. Thank you Father God for taking my messed up life, all my ugliness, all my ashes and turning them into beauty. Time and time again.

Isaiah 61:3 NIV

and provide for those who grieve in Zion-- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.

Baby Girl

Just met with early intervention for Baby girl. Please pray for her. She has microcephaly, motor skills challenges, a tight hamstring that will need physical therapy, feeding challenges as she refuses to eat solids.

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